Tuesday, May 20, 2008

What price marriage?

By all means marry: If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates (469 BC - 399 BC) Greek Philosopher

What price marriage?

With boundless joy, I deeply extend my red congratulations to the “orange” wedding of my beloved comrades Edward and Troie for celebrating a truly wonderful time of their life today। To their immediate family and loved ones for extending the kind of support they deserved. And to their friends and comrades who wish them all the best in life. Congratulations!
I। Bourgeois Concept of Marriage


Traditionally there are two major reasons for marriage। Marriage provides society with the guarantee for the structured perpetuation of the human species and the assurance of some security for the caring of the offspring of that marriage. This historical framework is based on the assumption that the results of procreation, children, are the responsibility of the two individuals involved and that they are obligated to provide support for these children until which time these children are able to provide for themselves.

In modern society where child rearing is not necessarily the primary purpose for committed relationships, the institution of marriage has evolved to be a reflection and expression of two individuals desire to offer or to provide support and protection to each other। Thus, marriage is based on mutual love, affection and an abiding desire to develop a relationship that is free of loneliness and fear.

Marriage is the partnership of two human beings, each bringing to the relationship love, caring and acceptance। It is a mutually beneficial relationship based on equality and respect for each other. Neither of the partners is superior to the other and neither of the partners has any overriding power over the other. It is truly a shared experience that is both fair and mutually responsible.

Christianity and Marriage
Most Christian denominations view marriage as a permanent and life long commitment between a man and woman। Christianity also views marriage as a holy sacrament and as a reflection of the relationship of Jesus Christ and the Church, in parallel to the Old Testament's teaching of the relationship between God and Israel.

By including the concept that all true believing Christians should submit one to another, the Evangelical view of marriage is considered hierarchical in nature with a loving dominance of the man over the woman। This loving dominance brings with it the responsibility for the care, sustenance, support and well being of the woman. The woman, who has submitted to the man in loving respect to him as the head of the family, sees herself as a follower in this family with the man heading his family as Christ heads the Church.

Marriage beneficial
Marriage is the first and best of all human institutions, if it can properly be called human, since it was first solemnized in Paradise, by the Creator himself, who then said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him।" And God blessed them, and God said unto them, be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it।"

It is impossible to enumerate all the benefits of marriage, since there is no vital interest of mankind which it does not affect favorably. Marriage perpetuates the human race; lays the foundations of organized society; promotes industry; accumulates wealth; cultivates the arts, and maintains religion. It builds the house, tills the soil, supports the family, and fosters every charitable and benevolent enterprise.

But that is the bourgeois sense.

II. Proletarian love, sex and marriage
On the other hand, what is the norm is not always what we wish to adhere।
I am fully aware that the personal or sex love that you have right now is because of your deep commitment to the national and democratic cause। If not because of your involvement to uplift the standard of the youth and students and the marginalized sectors and classes, you will never know each other, perhaps.

With that, we should be grateful to the seemingly insurmountable social volcano that has engulfed our dear motherland for it provides fertile condition to sprout two seeds named Edward and Troie; and also it encourages both of you to restore decency and respect in our benighted land.

But what a grateful Edward and Troie, unlike those getting married in the prime of their youth, your marriage is well tested and has a deep sense of accountability to our political commitment – our real, undying, and selfless vow.

Surely, both of you are forever grateful to the kind of people you encountered and talk to regarding the ups and downs, twists and turns of the relationship you cared for and of the love you cherished and established. Its effects to our commitment and how it changed the landscape of the youth and students movement which both of you are spending time, energy and commitment.

Our endless meetings made your love grow stronger. Our commitment to the cause brought both of you to realize that the future of your marriage is a bright one.

Now is the correct time to say that both of you contributed par excellence to the cause. Now is the most opportune time for both of you to look back and reflect your personal and political experience and reminds us all that the one who is justice without law, gift without return, welcome with out condition, whose last name is love – is what we value most.

III. What matters most?

Finally, my comrades Edward and Troie, you should realize that either of you own each other. Not even your future children. Not even their future. You belong to each other solely as a reminder of our self and of our society and the need to achieve victories for the oppressed masses of workers and peasants while both of you realizing the need to provide a viable atmosphere for a truly wonderful union.

Msgr. Dakay’s statement

Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Speak out: Msgr. Dakay’s statement
By Roxanne Omega-Doron
Provincial Coordinator, BisdakPride

LAST week, a statement from no less than Msgr. Achilles Dakay, media liaison officer of the Archdiocese of Cebu, added burden to the emotionally and physically problematic “Jan-Jan.”

To a certain degree, I am no longer surprised by his reality-detached statement.

It was un-Christian, common to some high-ranking Catholic church leaders, and an insult not only to Christian doctrine but to universally accepted human rights.

The Roman Catholic Church's position on issues is selective and biased.


Consider that the Church is mum about shanties of churchgoers demolished the past several years in the city and neighboring municipalities.

Even the demolition of stalls of Sto. Niño vendors several years ago did not catch its fancy.

Issues on extra-judicial killing of members and supporters of cause-oriented groups and media practitioners, wage and
benefits of workers, land problem and others should be given highest importance because the victims are the faithful.

But either you here nothing from the Church or you will hear it say a thing or two, nothing more.

As far as I know and based on teachings of Bible scholars (both Roman Catholic and its religious enemies) the Bible does not condemn homosexuality.

It is the individuals within the Church who are homophobic.


The good Lord understands and respects; the good Lord does not condemn.

The Song of Songs, Chapter 8:5-10 (new translation by Ariel Bloch and Chana Bloch) says:

“There, beneath the apricot tree, / Your mother conceived you, / There you were born./ In that very place, I awakened you.

“Bind me as a seal upon your heart, / A sign upon your arm, / For love is as fierce as death,/ Its jealousy bitter as the
grave./Even its sparks are a raging fire, / A devouring flame.

“Great seas cannot extinguish love, / No river can sweep it away / If a man tried to buy love/ With all the wealth of his house / He would be despised.

“We have a little sister / And she has no breasts, / What shall we do for our sister /When suitors besiege her? /

“If she is a wall, we will build / A silver turret upon her. / If she is a door, we will bolt her / With beams of cedar wood.

“I am a wall / And my breasts are towers / But for my lover I am/ A city of peace.”

Homosexuality cannot be regarded as punishable offense by persons who respect the mysterious laws of nature.

Its presence in the sexual practices of all cultures everywhere and at all times is proof that it deserves recognition as a natural human phenomenon as much as heterosexuality.

By condemning the act, the homosexual question has become a genuine question, one which has given rise to lively debate, and which will continue to be discussed until it has been resolved in a satisfactory way.

That's why I am no longer surprised by the statements of Msgr. Dakay.

He is just an inheritor of a feudal bias and homophobic Church.

The best way to argue is within the context of respect – you can't go any deeper than that.


While no longer surprised, my gay friends in the religious community, including myself is hemorrhaging profusely.

A lot of things need to be done to correct the evils in our midst, we uttered.

Finally, “Jan-Jan” is answerable to his God, which is truly private between an individual and his Creator.

What he really needs now is respect, comfort and love like what the good Lord taught us.

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